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Reminding myself over and over and over that it's actually quite traumatizing to be like "the third member of your family has cancer" even if that third member is canine, followed by "we're going to remove one of their whole limbs," followed then by all the healing.
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like it's been 2 weeks today since we brought him back home from surgery and besides worrying about him during the actual surgery--even though he's healing well, he's still healing and relearning stuff.
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and that means disruptions to our shared routines, and extra steps for care -- like does he have a clean t-shirt for tomorrow? He is also struggling to use his steps though he's good at jumping onto the couch. But it's hard for him to get momentum.
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He's also a bit clingier in that he's hanging out by the garage door if I'm out... which, it's not that he hasn't done that before, but not as much. And that makes sense. He spent all morning there while I was off at work. Anyway. He's doing super well but it's not simple/easy.
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And of course being confronted with his mortality, which is rough. I was talking to Micah earlier and he was saying he feels wiped too.
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probably also pulling up some stuff about my mom dying of cancer.